#Resource
# The Work of Byron Katie®
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## Step 1 — I Complain About \_\_\_ Because \_\_\_ Worksheet
*List the people in your life who you complain, worry, or are concerned about. What did they say or do? Do not write about yourself.*
> **Example:** I complain about Paul because he lied to me.
| I complain about | because |
|-----------------|---------|
| | |
| | |
| | |
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## Step 2 — Judge Your Neighbour Worksheet
*Choose a complaint from Step 1, or think of a stressful situation with someone. Meditate on one specific time and place. Use short, simple sentences.*
**1. Who angers, confuses, hurts, saddens, or disappoints you, and why?**
I am *(emotion)* with *(name)* because
**2. How do you want them to change? What do you want them to say or do?**
I want *(name)* to
**3. What advice would you offer them?**
*(name)* should / shouldn't
**4. What do you need them to think, say, feel, or do for you to be happy in this situation?**
I need *(name)* to
**5. What do you think of them in this situation?** *(It's okay to be petty and judgmental.)*
*(name)* is
**6. What is it about this person or situation that you never want to experience again?**
I don't ever want
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## Step 3 — One Belief at a Time Worksheet
*Write down one stressful thought — a complaint from above, or any stressful belief about someone you haven't fully forgiven.*
**Belief:**
*Mindfully revisit the specific situation, time, and place. Close your eyes, quietly open to what appears to you, and answer the following questions.*
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**Question 1 — Is it true?** *(Yes or no.)*
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**Question 2 — Can you absolutely know that it's true?** *(Yes or no.)*
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**Question 3 — How do you react — what happens — when you believe that thought?**
*Notice your emotions, and any images of past and future that arise. Notice how you treat yourself and others when you believe the thought.*
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**Question 4 — Who or what would you be without the thought?**
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## Step 4 — Turn the Thought Around
*Rewrite your belief as its opposite. Find at least three examples of how each turnaround is as true as, or truer than, your original statement.*
> **Example original:** He lied to me.
> **Turnarounds:** I lied to me · I lied to him · He didn't lie to me · He told me the truth.
**Original belief:**
**Turnaround 1:**
- Example A:
- Example B:
- Example C:
**Turnaround 2:**
- Example A:
- Example B:
- Example C:
**Turnaround 3:**
- Example A:
- Example B:
- Example C:
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*For the turnaround to Statement 6 from Step 2, replace "I don't ever want…" with "I am willing to…" and then "I look forward to…"*
**I am willing to**
**I look forward to**
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*© 2025 Byron Katie International, Inc. All rights reserved. thework.com*
---
The Work of Byron Katie®
Judge-Your-Neighbor Worksheet
Choose a complaint from your “I Complain About _____ Because ______” Worksheet or think of a
stressful situation with someone– for example, an argument. As you meditate on one specific time
and place, fill in the blanks below. Use short, simple sentences.
1. In this situation, who angers, confuses, hurts, saddens, or disappoints you, and why?
I am angry with Paul because he lied to me.
I am with because
emotion name
2. In this situation, how do you want them to change? What do you want them to say or do? *I want Paul to see that he is wrong. I want him to stop lying to me. I want him to apologise.*
I want to
name
3. In this situation, what advice would you offer him/her/them? “He/she/they should/shouldn’t…”
Paul shouldn’t frighten me with his behavior. He should take a deep breath.
should/shouldn’t
name
4. In order for you to be happy in this situation, what do you need him/her/them to think, say, feel, or
do? I need Paul to stop talking over me. I need him to really listen to me.
I need to
name
5. What do you think of him/her/them in this situation? Make a list. (It’s okay to be petty and
judgmental.) Paul is a liar, arrogant, loud, dishonest, and unconscious.
is
name
6. What is it about this person and situation that you don’t ever want to experience again?
I don’t ever want Paul to lie to me again. I don’t ever want to be disrespected again.
I don’t ever want
Now question each of your statements, using the four questions and turnarounds on a
One-Belief-At-A-Time Worksheet. For the turnaround to statement 6, replace the words
“I don’t ever want…” with “I am willing to…” and “I look forward to…”
The four questions
Example: Paul lied to me.
1. Is it true? (Yes or no. If no, move to question 3.)
2. Can you absolutely know that it’s true? (Yes or no.)
3. How do you react, what happens,
when you believe that thought?
4. Who or what would you be without the thought?
Turn the thought around.
I lied to me.
I lied to Paul.
Paul didn’t lie to me.
Paul told me the truth.
Find three examples of how each turnaround is
as true as, or truer than, your original statement.
©2025 Byron Katie International, Inc. All rights reserved. thework.com rev. 15 Jan. 2025