A short practical reference for moments when a strong feeling is pulling toward immediate action or conversation. The purpose is to slow the gap between signal and response long enough to act from values rather than reaction. ## The Three Stages **1. Acknowledge without acting** Name the feeling as information, not instruction. *Something is activated in me* — not *I must act.* Locate it in the body. Notice without amplifying. **2. Sit with it long enough to differentiate** Ask: - Is this a present signal or a familiar pattern? - Is it pointing outward at something real in this situation, or inward at an unmet need? - Is this one feeling or several layered together? - How long has this been present? A persistent feeling almost always has more layers than it first presents. Use [[Focusing - Gendlin]] if the feeling is strong or persistent — staying with the felt sense until it begins to articulate itself more precisely. **3. Run it through the values filter** - What does this feeling suggest I need? - Is acting on that consistent with how I want to be? - What kind of contact or outcome am I actually seeking? - Will the action I'm considering move toward that, or just discharge the feeling? Only then — if action or conversation still feels necessary — move forward. ## A Note on Persistent Feelings A feeling that has lasted days rather than hours is almost certainly carrying multiple signals — present circumstance, accumulated unmet needs, and older patterns activated by current events. Treating it as a single clear message pointing toward a single clear action is rarely accurate and often leads to responses that miss what the feeling is actually about. ## Related [[Feelings & Needs MOC]] | [[Focusing - Gendlin]] [[NVC Overview]] | [[Somatic Markers - Damasio]]